I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
