im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Randomize
