this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
