By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Randomize
