The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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