I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
There r osticjed everywhere
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Randomize
