NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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