I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
