hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
