Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I am full of burrito and curiosity
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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