ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
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