somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
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Mom said you looked used
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
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it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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