i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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