There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize
