Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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