wat bout pragnant strippers??
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
