I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize