It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
Randomize