he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
