There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
