sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
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