Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I think my fart just growled at me.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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