The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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