Three words: puerto rican gang bang
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
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