Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
it glows. i had to have it.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Randomize
