Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
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