i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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