I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
