if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Randomize
