well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
