We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
