I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
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