I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Randomize
