i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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