wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Randomize
