I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
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