Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
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