i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Randomize
