The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
