watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
should my penis look like a turkey
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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