Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
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