ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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