I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
