The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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