But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
