I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
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