Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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