puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Randomize
