HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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