did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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